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Rank: Horsham Forum Junior
      
Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 01 September 2007
Posts: 18,
Visits: 83
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Subject: FW: Rules from the lads!!! > > >Time for the Guys to hit back! > >Lads, I've never read a truer e-mail in my life. Girls, read and learn! > >We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the Rules >from the male side. > >These are our rules:- > >(Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!) > >1. Breasts are for looking at and that is why we do it. Don't try to >change that. > >1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it >down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining >about you leaving it down. > >1. Saturday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the >tides. Let it be. > >1. Shopping is NOT a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that >way. > >1. Crying is blackmail. > >1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do >not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say >it! > >1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. > >1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what >we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. > >1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. > >1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, >all comments become invalid after 7 days. > > >1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. > >1. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways >makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. > >1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. >Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. > >1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during >commercials. > >1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we. > >1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, >for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no >idea what Mauve is. > >1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. > >1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like >nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the >hassle. > >1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you >don't want to hear. > >1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. >REALLY. > >1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to >discuss such topics as Sex, Sport, or Cars. > >1. You have enough clothes. > >1. You have too many shoes. > >1. I am in shape. Round is a shape. > >Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch >tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping. > >Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh. > >Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them an education!! > >(We know best)
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